The “powers that be” (who are they?) have for several years now christened the third Monday in January as the most depressing day of the year. Apparently if you have made resolutions, they will have been broken by now, if you like Christmas it is a dim memory and you’re still paying for it, Spring is a long time coming and we’re still getting up and returning from work in the dark.
I’ve short circuited this this year by going to the Sunshine State for 10 days where the light is very bright and the glow hasn’t worn off yet! Sadly this is not normal behaviour for me or anyone else I know though I can recommend a January holiday for starting a year. The truth is, we never know what a year will hold when we approach it with all our hopes and fears. When we have those utterly suprising unlooked for moments of joy or sadness, or even downright tragic, we know all notions of control are delusional – though necessary to get us through the day! Rumi once said, “Today, like every other day, we wake up empty”. The thoughts and plans quickly pile in to cover that up of course. Way too scary!
So my new year’s resolution is to deepen my beginner’s practise of sitting with the emptiness. I’m terribly bad at it but as I sit beside the beds of people who are dying, or listen to friends who are excited about creating something or as I sit with myself, in all our growing and dying, my living well depends upon it. To keep the space open so I can be alive to the Divine flowing within and beyond me and try not get in the way so much. It was there before I began and will be there when I’m gone and I don’t want to miss it. It gilds everything. The Sufi Mystics have a saying that God says: “I was a hidden treasure and I longed to be made known”.
